I did heal last week, just long enough to accomplish everything I needed to do on preparation day. Then the harder trail started. I went back to being very sick. I spent a lot of time with various doctors trying to figure out what to do. Eventually they sent me to get a CT scan. That was probably the worst experience. After not being able to eat or drink almost anything for 3-4 days straight, I had to drink 4 cups of contrast solution (that smelled and tasted like fermented Windex) in less than 20 minutes. After 3.5 cups, no matter how hard I tried, my body would not let me finish that last bit. I never expected something so simple to be so hard. The bizarre thing is that I'm actually grateful for that experience. I will never comprehend even a 100th part of the atonement of Jesus Christ, but the symbolism of the "bitter cup" has become much more prominent to me. How much more grateful I am, that my Savior finished His cup, though incomprehensibly terrible- because He loved me. (Mark 14:36, D&C 19:16-17). Luckily the CT scan was normal, but that still left my doctor unsure. I went to a few more doctors and now I'm just waiting to find out. I hope all of this will get cleared up and I can be cleared to go to Hungary on Monday. But either way, I'm grateful for this, no matter how hard it's been. (D&C 29:39)- or as the hymn says "Nearer my God to Thee, nearer to Thee- even though it be a cross that raiseth me". I'm not going to lie and say this week hasn't been hard, but if it's a way closer to God, so be it. My wonderful MTC teacher said in my last interview "You're in good hands" (even more beautiful sounding in Hungarian). I am in good hands- hands that were pierced for me.
Thank you for all of your prayers in my behalf. I'm certain they helped carry me through the week. And yes, even with everything going on- I still spoke Hungarian the whole week (minus to the doctors and branch presidency). Hopefully I don't have to wait to go to Hungary because I think I'm as ready as I'm going to be at the MTC to teach others about this glorious plan and atonement. But He knows better than I do. For now, unless I write otherwise after my doctor's appointment tomorrow, you can expect my next e-mail to be coming from Hungary.
I'm also grateful today, because we finally got to go back to the temple. It was my last temple trip for at least the next 16 months, so I'm grateful I got to go. I'm grateful for the blessings of the temple.
Thanks again.Love you all.
P.S. If you want me to get mail from you for cheap, you better send it today. I only get mail every several weeks once I'm in Hungary ;) Love you all!